The Therapist Diaries

Hello and Welcome Back to The Therapist Diaries, Continuing on with our theme of healthy relationships I want to talk about something I used to talk about a lot when I was running my teen healthy relationship group.... The idea of attachment and when it's healthy to be attached to someone, and what it looks like when it crosses into the unhealthy territory.  Attachment is one of the most natural parts of being human. We are wired for connection, comfort, and emotional closeness, yet many people struggle to understand what healthy attachment actually looks like in practice. In modern relationships, it can be difficult to tell the difference between deep love and emotional dependency. Social media, dating culture, and years of romanticised ideas about “finding your other half” have blurred the lines between intimacy and losing yourself entirely in another person. And this isn't just an issue I see when I work with young people, but adults too!  Many people no matter their age gr...

 Hello and Welcome Back to the Therapist Diaries,  Have you ever found yourself doing the very thing that pulls you away from what you want most? Maybe you procrastinate on something important, push away people who care about you, abandon goals right as they start to feel possible, or repeat patterns you promised yourself you were done with. If so, you’re not broken, and you’re not alone. This is often what we call self-sabotage , and it’s far more common (and understandable) than most people realize. As a therapist, I want to start with this: self-sabotage is not a character flaw . It is usually a learned survival strategy that once made sense, even if it no longer serves you now. Self-sabotage refers to behaviors, conscious or unconscious, that interfere with our goals, values, or well-being. These behaviors might look like: Procrastination or avoidance Perfectionism that keeps you stuck Negative self-talk or harsh inner criticism Pushing away people closest to us  Stay...